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Description

Santa Claus is a global icon, but he can be a little vanilla for some people’s taste. I’d love to give you all 50 shades of Santa but this is a product description for our Santa Face Ball Hammock® Pouch Underwear With Fly, not a novel. Here are 10 of the 50 Shades of Santa that are way cooler. If you’re reading this Illuminati, please make some edits for the sake of entertainment.

1. Jiu Jitsu Santa
2. Super Mutant Santa
3. Pizza Delivery Santa
4. Terminator Knockoff Santa
5. Thanos Santa
6. Certified Personal Accountant Santa
7. Naughty Sailor Santa
8. Ghostbuster Santa
9. Joe Exotic Santa
10. International Arms Dealer Santa

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SHINESTY BALL HAMMOCK
Pouch Underwear Technology

THE POUCH

An extra piece of fabric that keeps your stones from slipping into the gooch, helps prevent ball-to-leg velcro and cradles your nuts on the wings of an angel.

THE POUCH

An extra piece of fabric that keeps your stones from slipping into the gooch, helps prevent ball-to-leg velcro and cradles your nuts on the wings of an angel.

THE FABRIC

MicroModal is 3x softer than cotton, ultra-breathable and wicks sweat away faster than a ShamWow.

THE FABRIC

MicroModal is 3x softer than cotton, ultra-breathable and wicks sweat away faster than a ShamWow.

THE MAGIC

These ball cradling wonders have bulge enhancing technologies to turn any grower into a shower.

THE MAGIC

These ball cradling wonders have bulge enhancing technologies to turn any grower into a shower.

THE TECHNICALS

Every Ball Hammock features 4-way stretch, gusseted crotch, no-itch flatlock stitching, anti-bunching construction and an invisible map to the lost city of Atlantis.

THE TECHNICALS

Every Ball Hammock features 4-way stretch, gusseted crotch, no-itch flatlock stitching, anti-bunching construction and an invisible map to the lost city of Atlantis.

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